Florence Osmund                  

Literary Agent Responses You Can Expect ~~

• Thank you for your query, but I don’t believe I would be the right agent for your work at this time.  Be aware that publishing is a subjective business, and other agents may feel differently. We wish you all the best in your search for representation and publication.  This, by far, was the most frequent response to my query letters.  It must be what's taught in Literary  Agent 101.

• Alas – and as much as I hate to relay the news thru this form response – the query was not quite intriguing enough to inspire me to offer representation or further consideration of your project.  Same message, just a lot wordier.

• Thanks, but you can’t sell a mainstream novel unless you’ve been published before.  Oh, really?

• Not for me.  Good luck.  Short and sweet.

• Unfortunately, we are unable to represent your work.  Please note that all queries/manuscripts/proposals received are recycled.  Well, at least they’re environmentally conscious.

• I found your material well-structured and engaging.  However, I am not enthused enough about it to take it on.  Talk about your mixed messages.

• Not for us, but do try publishers directly, and if you need help negotiating a contract, our legal staff can help you.  May as well cover all your bases.

• The concept just didn’t grab me.  I guess that’s another way to put it.

• I have read the attachment but felt your novel was unlikely to thrive in such a competitive market.  Nice way of saying we think your work stinks.

• I am not currently accepting queries from prospective clients. If you and your work are what I typically look for, then your query will be welcomed during the month of July. Only queries received during the July annual "submission period" will be considered. Unfortunately, any correspondence from writers seeking representation who do not already have my attention will be discarded unanswered if received at any other time.  Wow.

• I doubt that we could sell this book at the present time.  "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, and to love kindness and mercy, and to humble yourself and walk humbly with your God?" Micah 6:8   Brutal honesty followed by a scripture.

• Due to the overwhelming volume of queries I receive and the number of rude responses when I politely decline to review work, I no longer reply to them.   Could have saved us both time if that statement was posted on his/her website.

• We are eager to find new books and writers, and we love to get excited about them. But the only way we can make a living is by selling books to big and midsize publishers, and selling small books by new writers is becoming more difficult. Now is the best time ever to be a writer, but finding new writers is the hardest part of our job, and it's getting harder.  Okay . . . but are you interested in representing me?

While most agents accept and even prefer electronic queries, some still require a hard copy query via the U.S. Mail service and a SASE if you want a response.  I’m not sure why any writer would send out a query letter and NOT want a response.  Anyway I found it interesting that 28% of such agents never responded to my queries.  Could they be that hard up for stamps?

If you have received an interesting or amusing query letter response, send it to me at info@florenceosmund.com and I’ll share it.